If my name was Betty Windsor and Philip was my queen,
I would travel around the world, demanding to be seen.
I’d sail to every sea port and claim them each my own,
and then I’d fly to every land, establishing my throne.
Perhaps I’d have grandchildren and call them Corgi names.
I’d ban those Greek Olympics and start my own world games.
I would use blue rinse in my hair, with streaks of pinks and greens
and hang out with the Londoners in skin tight studded jeans.
I’d have a topless bodyguard...
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